This Is Not My Beautiful Blog
Posted on | November 8, 2007 at 7:16 am | 3 Comments
Now for another session of my favorite game, “How did you get here?” I love to look at the logs and see what search terms unknown surfers used to find my site. This is also a great NaBloPoMo filler post – easy to write and it satiates the appetite.
Infuriatingly, the #1 search term continues to be the title of this post, which is also the title of a Journey song. I usually see dozens of those a week. I’ve somehow moved up from the #3 results on Google for that phrase to #2. Part of me likes the traffic it attracts and is hoping to eventually make it to #1 on Google, but part of me wants all Journey fans to migrate to a compound in Texas or Central America somewhere where there is no Internet access.
The #2 search term, which occurs a couple of times a week is “becoming a hermit”, which points to this post. I’m currently the #3 result on Google for that one. Several things about this disturb me. It probably means that people who are thinking about retreating from society are finding my blog in droves. It doesn’t matter that I don’t actually have instructions for doing so here. I don’t want FlasshePoint to become part of a Hermit Webring. And of course it’s kind of scary that potential future Kaczynski’s are coming to my blog looking for info. I hope I’m not saying anything to encourage them. Although if the hermits-in-training are Journey fans, I probably wouldn’t complain if they headed for the woods (see above).
One very popular search term lately is the name of my friend Bryce, who passed away a few weeks ago. It does give me some comfort that people who knew him are coming to this blog to get info on him and are seeing my eulogy. I just wish they would post some comments and share their memories of him. There are also a lot of searches along the line of “reasons to not believe in God” and “I don’t believe in God anymore” that end up at this post. It warms the blackness of my unbelieving heart when budding atheists come here for succor.
Another really popular search result that points here is the lyrics to the song “40 Years” by House of Freaks (”a million hearts a million minds”, etc), which points to this post about murdered HoF singer Bryan Harvey. Many people are including “gilmore girls” in the terms, which tells me they’ve heard Grant Lee Phillips singing the song on the show and were wondering what the song was. Well, now they know.
Another search term I see a lot is “origin of storms”, which goes to this post. I can’t figure out if these people are weatherbugs or Blue Öyster Cult fans. (BTW, I forgot to mention in my review of the New Pornographers show the other night that one of the songs playing on the loudspeakers before the Pornos took the stage was BÖC’s “Burnin’ For You”. How awesome is that? And right before that was America’s “Sister Golden Hair”. Double awesomeness!)
The most disturbing search term I’ve seen lately was “how use rubber bands in bondage” which points to this post. My answer to this person: “Very carefully”. Not that I have experience with such things. I’m more a fan of fuzzy handcuffs myself. And candle wax. (FYI, as a followup to that long ago post: For awhile my newspaper carrier started using rubber bands again. But then they stopped again. Luckily I saved them just in case the supply dried up again, so I’ve got plenty now.)
One search this week was for “what is the biggest mystery?”. I’m sorry that the post it pointed to was about the TV show Lost and not something more metaphysical. Of course, the actual biggest mystery on this blog is the fork thing, or maybe the clock thing. Both of those mysteries are still outstanding. The biggest mystery in real life is “When will Chinese Democracy finally be released?”. Or maybe, “Who’s your daddy?” (snap).
Jogged Today: No. I’ve got a cold and I slept in.
Today’s Weight: 162.6 lbs
Lunch Yesterday: Homemade ham sandwich with a slice of 2% cheddar cheese.
Pet Peeve of the Day: Getting sick right before a three day weekend. And I’ve got out-of-town friends visiting next week. Aaaargh.
Latre.
Comments
3 Responses to “This Is Not My Beautiful Blog”
November 8th, 2007 @ 4:14 pm
Haven’t skimmed my web traffic logs in many years, but I did save a few search query gems way back when. Just shut down my web hosting account this week, so it’s a timely reminisce…
I always got a lot of people looking for Dave Barry after I wrote an essay titled “Dave Barry Must Die” – that’s another sign you should name stuff after famous people. But the best – or most disturbing? – mismatches were all sorts of queries which, one way or other, matched up with a joke photo caption I wrote: “Underage kitten poses nude in latest Humane Society calendar”…
November 8th, 2007 @ 9:47 pm
I was really hoping to drive up traffic to my site with that post title that contained the phrase “Britney Spears’ vagina.”
It didn’t work.
The stratagem, I mean. No idea about the other – despite our having been in Vegas on the very same weekend she married for the first time.
December 15th, 2007 @ 9:42 am
very interesting, but I don’t agree with you
Idetrorce