Please Stop Telling Me How Great Costco Is
Posted on | August 25, 2008 at 7:22 am | 10 Comments
Pet Peeve of the Day: Proselytizing about Costco.
Enough, already. I believe you! Costco is obviously the greatest store in the world! They have everything under the sun for fantastic prices. Their food is to die for. Yes, yes, I know. I don’t think I’ve ever set foot in one, but your description definitely lets me know what I’m missing out on. However, I prefer not to pay the membership fee, and go out of my neighborhood for my shopping, and to buy bulk amounts of things that I don’t have the room to store and may never use all of anyway.
I know that the pre-made appetizers, desserts and meals that they have there are the best on the planet, because you and everyone else I know has brought some to parties that I’ve attended. Yes, their seafood, including the wonderful crab legs and lobsters, are the freshest and cheapest you can get outside of a coastal city. Yes, I’m sure that the transmission overhaul they did on your car was faster and cheaper than any dealer or local mechanic could’ve done, and now it changes gears as smoothly as a squirrel climbs a tree. Yes, you’ve told me again and again how the Xanax you buy at Costco is so much more potent than the Xanax from the local pharmacy. Yes, the chair massage you received while your kids where in Costco Daycare just melted all that tension away (tension caused by those very same kids making the dog throw up in your minivan, which the Costco Car Detailing Technicians promptly cleaned up). And the Hawaiian vacation you booked through Costco was no doubt the best vacation of your life. But all that doesn’t mean I can’t get along with availing myself of those goods and services elsewhere.
I’m beginning to suspect from the way that you talk about Costco, there’s some kind of Orgasm Machine in the back room that long-time cultists members are allowed to use on their shopping trips. Sometimes I think that’s the only possible explanation for your undying devotion to this monolithic warehouse. Yes, I know that one of your children was born in the cereal aisle at Costco, helped along by the Costco Medical Staff, but that doesn’t mean I want to get my ingrown toenail treated there.
Instead of telling me how great Costco is, why don’t you tell me what you’ve been up to lately? And I don’t mean I want to hear about the gambling addict support group that you’ve been attending at Costco on Tuesday nights. Tell me about some good meals you had at local restaurants, instead of whatever it was you fried up last night that you got from Costco. Tell me about some of the interesting extracurricular things your kids have been up to, and not about how good their grades are at Costco Elementary School.
So… you stop telling me about how great Costco is, and I’ll stop talking about all the problems I have at Safeway. Deal? Deal.
Latre.
Jogged Today: Yes (@ 61°F)
Songs That Came Up On The iPod While Jogging:
- “Rock’n Roll” (The Sounds)
- “Heros in June” (Echobelly)
- “The Red Baron” (Game Theory)
- “1934″ (The Connells)
- “Introduction by Young Tom” (Dandy Warhols)
- “I Still Remember” (Bloc Party)
- “Hang on to Your Ego” (Frank Black)
- “Last Second of the Minute” (The Wonder Stuff)
Videogame(s) Played Yesterday: None.
Abasement
Posted on | August 24, 2008 at 9:44 am | 2 Comments
Movie Review Sunday!
Last week, the girlfriend and I finally had a chance to watch Atonement, another of the 2007 Best Picture-nominated movies. After this, the only one I still need to see is There Will Be Blood. Atonement is a frisky little flick about a raccoon, a turtle, and a squirrel-like thing who are always trying to raid suburban homes for food back in the last ice age. No wait… if only.
Actually, as I’m sure everyone reading this blog already knows, it’s the story of two lovers (played by Kiera Knightly and James McAvoy) separated by the deliberate actions of a young girl at the beginning of World War II. When I first heard about this movie, I thought it was mostly going to be about the lovers trying to reunite throught the fires of war and all that. But no, it’s actually more about the young girl and how she seeks to atone for her act (hence the title). In the course of the movie, you do find out what happened to the lovers (two different outcomes in two different ways), but that’s not the important part of the story.
The movie jumps around in time a lot, and not only because the narrative is split into three different time periods linearly, but also because there are disconcerting flashbacks or recreations within those parts. I understand the book it was based on had the same structure. Sometimes that kind of thing can draw you more into the story, but I felt pulled out of it this time, even though I could mostly follow it. The first part of the story, which sets up the incident that propels the rest of the story, is the most interesting part, even if it does seem a bit too “Merchant-Ivory gentle English countryside in the 30s” for my sensibilities. But the characters are well drawn and the story moves along fairly briskly.
The second part, set in World War II, is a bit more plodding as you learn what happened to the three main characters and how their lives have changed. The most fascinating part of this is a scene set at the evacuation of Dunkirk (which I had to look up, because I didn’t know that much about it and didn’t completely understand what was happening), which includes a nicely done 5-minute continuous (no cuts) “walking on the beaches” shot. That’s pretty stunning. I found it hard to stay awake for much of the rest of the WWII scenes, especially the scene of a nurse consoling a dying French soldier. Yes, I’m a hard-bitten bastard.
The last part is set in modern times with one of the characters explaining what actually happened to everyone. Though it was emotional and moving, and it gave the movie its theme, it was ultimately somewhat annoying and a let-down for a denouement. I don’t need a Hollywood ending every time, but I think I would’ve liked a more conventionally climatic ending (whether good or bad) in this case, instead of someone just talking. I was hoping legions of zombies would rise from the dead and eat some brains or something.
The movie’s okay for a rental, but I’m glad I didn’t see it in the theater. It is a pretty nice movie to look at and it shined on the Home Theater even though it wasn’t in Blu-Ray. In comparison to the other nominated movies, I put it below Juno and Michael Clayton, but about even with No Country For Old Men. As I said, I still need to see There Will Be Blood.
Bonus Movie: Last night on Cinemax HD, I watched the 2007 flick Shoot ‘Em Up, which featured Clive Owen on the run protecting a newborn infant and killing people with carrots. Lots and lots of carrots. ‘Nuff said. It ruled.
Latre.
Poignant Search Term Of The Day That Led To This Blog: “hot rails to hell meaning”.
Videogame(s) Played Yesterday: Heavenly Sword (PS3)
Political Pastries
Posted on | August 23, 2008 at 11:10 am | 2 Comments
As Denver prepares for the Democratic National Convention, anything goes. Everyone’s getting into the act! The erotic bakery near work is offering some confections promoting the candidate. I didn’t actually go into the bakery to check out the sweets. I was too afraid of what I might find there. Very afraid. Just how would Obama be depicted on these cupcakes? Hopefully it was just his name or his face. But I really, really didn’t want to know.
(FYI, there’s an accidental 4-second video clip of the sign that I posted here, which has been getting quite a few views!)
The New York Times did this “helpful” article about Denver for people attending the convention from out of town. It’s a caused a bit of an uproar here, especially since the only two restaurants it mentions are The Fort and Buckhorn Exchange. Good restaurants, true, but Denver cuisine is so much more than big slabs of beef. Food critic Jason Sheehan had an appropriate rebuttal, with some much better culinary suggestions, in his Westword column this week, including “the best sushi between L.A. and Manhattan”. The Onion also gets into the act with their Denver recommendations. Funny, and true, stuff.
But my favorite “Guide to Denver” piece is this one from Westword, which details the appearances of real Colorado landmarks in the TV show South Park. Essential reading for out-of-state South Park fans who never quite got all the Colorado in-jokes. Yes, Casa Bonita does exist, and it’s exactly like it was portrayed in the show.
Stayed tuned for more in-depth coverage of the DNC, coming to you semi-live here from FlasshePoint all next week. Or most of next week. Or however much I feel like talking about it. Frankly, if I do talk about it, it will all most likely be about how it is inconveniencing me personally. Though I am hoping for a celebrity sighting or two.
Latre.
Pet Peeve of the Day: How the iPhone spell-corrected my “Latre” sign-off to “Later” when I posted my blog from it yesterday.
Poignant Search Term Of The Day That Led To This Blog: “hot checkers at safeway”. (Obviously they’re not looking for “fiber guy”. Besides, he’s just a bagger.)
Videogame(s) Played Yesterday: Heavenly Sword (PS3)
iBlogging
Posted on | August 22, 2008 at 6:08 am | 4 Comments
This here post is being composed on my phone using the iPhone WordPress app. So, out of necessity, it’s going to be short. Though I’m definitely getting better at using the virtual keyboard, I’m still not very fast at it. I long for an outboard bluetooth keyboard attachment, but I don’t see that as being part of Apple’s plan. Then they would have to admit that the “v.board” is not everyone’s cup of tea. Though it does work well in a pinch. Yikes! I feel my hand cramping up already. Need more practice. And cut/copy/paste can’t come fast enough for this to be in the running for a real composition tool.
This WordPress app is pretty bare-bones. There’s no way to automatically enter links and tags, for example, like in the full-featured web client. Of course, I could just use that client in the browser on the iPhone, but it’s too cluttered for the lack of screen real estate. This app does maximize the text editing area.
Another bad thing about this app is that drafts composed on it are not accessible from the WP web client. I can understand why, but I don’t like it. That makes it impossible to start an entry on the iPhone and finish it on a computer.
So there you have it. I can’t see myself using this app very often, but it will come in handy when I lack sufficient access to the Internet through other means.
Later.
P.S. No jogging today, no videogames yesterday, and no new interesting search terms lately. Oh yeah, no pre-DNC celebrity sightings yet. And nothing really interesting to say this morning. Guess I need to re-read my 20 Tips For Daily blogging. (Link not included because it’s too hard.)
Late To The Merge
Posted on | August 21, 2008 at 5:54 am | 4 Comments
Regular readers of this blog know that I like to talk about traffic a lot. Driving and roads and traffic and drivers and pedestrians and bicyclists fascinate, and infuriate, me. In last Thursday’s Rocky Mountain News, there was a review of a book called Traffic: Why We Drive the Way We Do (and What It Says About Us) by Tom Vanderbilt. The book looks very interesting and I want to read it. That review led me to Tom’s traffic blog: How We Drive, which has enthralled me lately.
The book and the website debunk a lot of preconceived notions that people have about traffic and traffic flow. I know that I myself detest roundabouts, even though study after study shows that they are a Good Thing. I follow traffic reports even though I know they don’t do any good. I drive fast even though I know I should drive slower. Vanderbilt is one of the primary advocates, or converts of the “late merge”, which postulates that it’s better to be one of those douchebags who wait until the end of a lane before merging into an adjacent one, because the roads are designed that way and traffic would flow smoother if everyone did that. I guess I believe the people who say this, but I still find it hard to do that and put up with the nasty looks from the other drivers. Besides, I’m always early for everything.
I know that in many ways I’m a bad driver and that I’m probably too aggressive, but apparently like all drivers, I consider myself to be a good driver. Or at least a better driver than most of them out there. I do think I’m better at always keeping track of the traffic patterns around me and anticipating potentially bad situations. But maybe I’m just deluding myself.
I look forward to delving into this World of the Road in more depth.
More to come, I’m sure…
Latre.
Poignant Search Term Of The Day That Led To This Blog: “i don’t believe teenagers are children”.
Videogame(s) Played Yesterday: Castlevania: Portrait of Ruin (DS)
20 Tips For Daily Blogging
Posted on | August 20, 2008 at 7:10 am | 5 Comments
So, you’ve decided to try your hand at Blogging Every Day! Congratulations! You are officially insane! As someone who’s been doing the daily thing for quite a long time now, I have some tips for you. Most of these assume you are putting a lot of importance on not missing a day of blogging.
- Clear it with you significant other, if you have one. Make sure he/she is on board with the fact that you may be ignoring him/her (or your household duties) for some random period of time every day that could be quite long. Don’t try to hide what you’re doing! Maybe involve him/her if you can: proofreading, guest blogging, picture taking, whatever. And don’t neglect your kids or pets either!
- Observe. Be aware of your surroundings at all times, especially when you’re out and about. You never know what will give you an idea. You’ll be surprised at the things you notice that might be of interest to other people and the correlations you can make between subjects. Anything can be fodder for a blog entry if you can get a decent picture of it or can pad out a description. Look for patterns in things. Read all the signs you see and try to absorb their meanings. Note odd behaviors in people. Besides finding the time to write entries, the biggest problem with daily blogging is finding something to write about every day, so always be on the lookout for unusual things.
- Always keep a camera close by and take a lot of pictures. Cell phones are great for this. Not only can you use the pictures as a topic for posting, but they can also be used to pad out or add visual interest to a lame entry.
- Compose at night, post it in the morning. It’s a safety net. You never know what household emergency or website access problem will come along that will prevent you from posting an entry, so best to get it out of the way as early in the day as you can. And if you miss it, you still have the rest of the day to come up with something. Also, letting a post “gel” overnight will sometimes allow you to come up with some important additions and corrections. Like that last line.
- Don’t post during or about work! Common sense. Don’t let blogging interfere with your job, unless you’re trying to get fired.
- If you can’t think of something to post about, don’t stress about it too much or force it. Get away from the computer and you’ll be surprised how fast something will occur to you.
- Totally stuck for a blog topic? Try a random word generator or Oblique Strategies.
- Ask your friends and family what they would like to see you write about. If someone makes a suggestion, twist it into something strange or dark.
- Have some backup drafts ready to post for those days when you have no time or just can’t think of something new. Needless to say, those posts would have to be about non-timely matters or issues. My posts about the band Kayak’s catalog fall into this category for me.
- Heck, consider writing multiple posts in one sitting and posting them one day at a time, in order to give yourself a break for a couple of days. They could all have time-dependent references and such as long as you don’t delay too long in posting them.
- Don’t divide the focus of your blog post. Never do a single entry with multiple topics when it can easily be split into two or more entries. If an entry becomes too long, consider breaking it up into shorter ones. That’s why I (more or less) stopped including my “Pet Peeve of the Day” at the bottom of my posts. Unless they’re really short, they can usually be spun off into their own entry.
- Have some sort of daily or near-daily bit you can include in posts to pad them out, or to use in lieu of having something real to say that day. Though I have avoided doing it so far, I could create an entry composed of just my jogging playlist and/or my “search term of the day” in a pinch.
- Anything can be padded out. Talk when there is nothing to say! Remember, Daily Blogging is all about quantity, not quality! Okay, not really, but sometimes it seems that way.
- Have some sort of theme you can use for certain days or whatever. Steve used to post recipes every Wednesday, but I think he must’ve run out by now. I try to post movie/DVD reviews on Sundays. You can always forego the theme for a week if something more exciting comes along!
- Avoid having a theme for the entire blog, as that makes it harder to find something to talk about on those writer’s block days. Or if you do have a theme, consider breaking it from time to time. Focus: Good, Rigid Theme: Bad.
- Read a lot of news stories. There’s always fodder for discussion in current events, even if you’re not a political blogger. Of course, you run the risk of every third blogger on the Internet bringing up the same thing.
- Going on vacation? Prepare some entries in advance and post them from your cell phone or from the hotel’s computer or from an Internet café or something. Don’t know if you’ll have internet access? Have a friend you trust post the drafts for you. Or just post them all after you get back and change the datestamps. (I consider the last one to be cheating, but not the other ones. However, I do think it’s okay to change the datestamp in a situation where you did actually have the post composed in time, but were unable to post it because you were having problems with your website or ISP.) Or, if you’re technically competent, write a timed script to post the entries for you.
- Peruse your access logs or use something like StatCounter to see how people you don’t know are reaching your blog. That can give you ideas for tailoring future blog entries. Or for avoiding topics pr phrases that may attract a repeat unsavory element.
- Get tips and ideas from other like-minded souls, like the Blog365 people.
- Constantly take notes for future blog topic ideas. Cell phones and PDAs are especially good for this. I find that I sometimes forget a great idea if I don’t write it down right away.
So there you go. Just remember: It’s easy! It’s a creative outlet! It’s fulfilling! It’s fun! It’s not the least bit stressful!
Misery loves company. I guess the best tip I can give is: “Have no life!”. Just kidding. The best tip is: Don’t forget to have a life outside of the blogging. Don’t make it your #1 focus and don’t let it rule your life.
Latre.
Poignant Search Term Of The Day That Led To This Blog: “sign up for henching”. (This came from Korea!)
Spam of the Day: I got a spam e-mail from “Liz Patterson”. Strange that she’s taking some time out of her wedding to Anthony (*shudder*) to send me a solicitation for home mortgages.
Videogame(s) Played Yesterday: Heavenly Sword (PS3)